Is your nice relationship beginning to hit the rocks? Have your guys started to argue over the least important and mundane things?
Is the steam of happiness between yourself and your partner evaporating?
These are 7 great answers to you that when implemented can give life back to your ailing or already dead relationship.
If you have been doing this and the relationship is as bad as it is, it means you might have to do it better, and more frequently.
“My top tip for this would be to put down the technology and connect,” relationship therapist, Patrick Schultz M.A., tells Bustle. He suggests spending 20 minutes out of your day to turn the TV off, put the phone and laptop away, and connect with your partner.
There is a right way and a wrong way to communicate. The right way is asking your partner a relevant question, listening to their response, then offering your opinion.
The wrong way is overwhelming your partner with your irritations and worries as soon as they walk in from a particularly long workday. There’s surely no way to heal a fractured relationship with this kind of approach.
To get out of that anger and bitterness, you may have to remind yourself of the reasons why you fell in love with your partner.
2. Learn to own up, learn to forgive
Again owning up and forgiveness are two more things you need. It is not enough to expect your partner to own up to their actions and take responsibilities for their actions, the willingness to forgive has to be there as well.
But before forgiveness comes taking responsibility for one’s actions. if you want your relationship to overcome any major issues, you need to own up to where you went wrong and then let it go.
3. Actively do exciting things together
Seek out exciting things to do with your partner, then go out and do those things. New, fun stuff. Old, tested and amazing stuff. Bring back memories, roll back the years, go relive experiences you bonded over at the beginning of your relationship.
Just go out there, look for the trips and thrills and catch all of it with your partner. These are the type of stuff that people get giddy over in the early periods of relationships. Experiencing all of that again could have a positive effect on your relationship.
4. Eyes on your partner
Another way to save a relationship is to keep an eye on your partner’s needs and begin to do them like never before. How they like things done, what they like doing, the type of things that make them happy, the things that put them at peace, things that put a smile on their face, the things that make them feel loved, treasured, heard and seen.
The result of being sensitive in this new manner would surprise you.
Owning up and forgiveness are two more things you need to turn things around
5. It’s a joint effort
Sometimes you aren’t the only problem, and you alone can’t remedy the situation. You both need to want to make it work, and you both need to try to make it work. You need to be a team.
6. Do as you say
Have you promised to love and to cherish and hold and all that stuff? Then stick to it. No one said love has to be only when your partner is being good and all, and promising that you’ll love them regardless is one promise you have to keep to.
Because, according to LifeHack: “some talk a good game, but don’t back it up. Others finally get it and change from the heart. They are serious and want to preserve the relationship they cherish.
“They back up their words with action. This is done every day. Over time it becomes apparent their love is genuine.”
7. Why are you together?
You might have to ask yourselves this question at some point so you both know if this is a relationship you are both invested in, one you are both committed to saving.
You may have to remind yourself of what drew you to them in the very first instance. What qualities in them do you cherish most, what did you fall in love about them and all?
Also, asking your partner what they love and don’t love about you could go a long, long way.